Tag Archives: expression

Jun 29

“Staying in POV” by Mary Deal

Staying in POV
by
Mary Deal

Let’s say your story is being told from Sadie’s point of view. She’s your main character. As the story progresses, you have her friend approach and you write it like this:

Jeremy walked straight toward her. “Great to see you, Sadie.” His words couldn’t express what he was thinking. She had lost all that weight and bordered on having a model’s figure. Now he really wanted to bed her. He decided he’d treat her real sweet this time.

Notice that the above paragraph tells us what Jeremy is thinking. He is not the main character. Sadie is the main character. She cannot possibly know what Jeremy is thinking, so you cannot include it written that way.

You can, however, have Sadie read Jeremy’s facial expression and mannerisms and react to it from her point of view. She can show the reader what Jeremy does that will tell the reader what’s on Jeremy’s mind. What Jeremy may think and feel doesn’t have to be spelled out. It can be interpreted by the main character. Like this:

Sadie watched Jeremy walk toward her. His sauntering gait gave him enough time to notice her new figure and to feel his glands working as he eyed her from head to toe and back again. She knew him. He’d always made innuendoes about wanting to hop in bed again and renewing their sorry relationship.

“Great to see you, Sadie,” Jeremy said. His eyes had that hungry look. He always looked that way, as if sex was the only thing her image triggered in his mind. Maybe it was, but being used and cast aside was no longer part of her new image of self-respect.

Sadie stepped away when he reached for her. “Don’t try to touch me, Jerry. We washed up a long time ago and you’re still trying to own me.”

Jeremy’s expression went hollow. “You got me all wrong,” he said. The corner of his mouth twitched. That always happened when he was faced with the truth.

Staying in the POV character’s head gives you a chance to create a character with some smarts, at least, enough to intuit other characters’ actions and thoughts. It also gives you a greater chance of added detail and some interesting fleshing out of your prose that makes the action come alive. Notice that in the above short paragraphs, Jeremy actually confirms what Sadie has interpreted from him. It’s much more interesting.

Please visit Mary Deal’s website for more wonderful articles like this one: Write Any Genre. Read More

Posted in Author Blogs, Author Colleagues, Guest Blogging, Interviews | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment
Apr 13

Mary Deal Tells us What it Means When “It’s My Time”

It’s My Time
by
Mary Deal

Some time ago I saw a TV commercial where a middle-aged woman, after years of raising a family, had just received her college degree. She wears a cap and gown and clutches her diploma. Her eyes and expression say she’s dreaming of doors opening and new possibilities. The background music goes: “It’s my ti-i-ime….”

I’m a firm believer that we all have our time. Friends told me, “You sound like you‘ve hit your stride.” I also thought I had when finally realizing that I could write and actually started producing stories that sold. It was the beginning of my time.

My point is, whether or not you’ve reached a point you can call your time, why stop what you’re doing when your life has led you to this point?

Finding your time doesn’t happen all at once. It may happen without you realizing it at first. It’s a matter of steps, one success after another. Too, it also depends on what we each consider our time.

* Is your time when you finally begin writing after years of only dreaming about it?
* Do you look forward to your time as getting some short stories, even a novel published?
* Or is your time when you have finally written a novel that turns into a blockbuster?

Regardless when you consider you’ve reached a milestone in your career, each little success is your time; each success is a small step toward a greater reward. Each success is your time because you continue to do what you love the most.

Please visit Mary Deal’s website for more wonderful articles like this one: Write Any Genre. Read More

Posted in Author Blogs, Author Colleagues, Guest Blogging, Interviews | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment
Aug 25

“Any Way You Distort It” (It’s Still Plagiarism!) by Mary Deal

“How’d you like my story?” he asked, as I returned his edited manuscript.
We’d built up a good working relationship over the last few months but this was the limit. “C’mon, DH. You copied ‘The Horse Dealer’s Daughter’,” I said. He and I have been through this act before.
“Not really,” he said. “I saw a way to make it better.”
I almost laughed. “There’s no creativity in rewriting someone else’s stories. You copied at least one line verbatim.” He looked sheepish but shrugged it off. “Your lady, Sable Erwin, like Lawrence’s Mabel Pervin, after having been saved from drowning herself in the pond asks, ‘Who undressed me?’”
“I liked that line,” he said.
“You even used the same staircase scene from Lawrence’s story.”
“No, my staircase is on the opposite wall.” He held up his manuscript. “This is my story. All mine. And it’s better.”
“These are not yours. You simply rewrite other people’s stories by wearing out your Thesaurus. You’ve used lines straight from original bodies of work. Like…like that.” I gestured toward his manuscript. I was sickened by what he’d been doing all along. Frustrated, too, because I’d been editing his work and since I’m not as widely read, didn’t catch on right away. “When you submit these around, professional readers spot the similarities.”
“With all the writers around today, no one knows who wrote what anymore.”
“The only thing your rewriting is getting you is a reputation as the person with the most rejections.”
By now, I knew I’d better be careful of what I said. I wasn’t going to convince him of the error of his ways but I, at least, wanted to make a point. “I can’t edit you anymore,” I said. “And you needn’t continue to edit my work.”
“That’s fine with me. Your POVs are always confused anyway.”
“That’s because you read from a man’s point of view. I am woman. If I begin a story with “I” and the antagonist (opposing character) is named Bobby, and the “I” and Bobby is married, then the “I” is female. So you shouldn’t ask me to clarify “I” in the first sentence of the story.”
“Women use “Bobby.”
“Most likely spelled ‘Bobbi.’ You know I don’t write from a male POV.”
“Creativity works in many ways,” he snapped. He evidently thought the conversation on points of view too hot. “I happen to get inspired by the better writers.”
“But you’re not creating your own masterpieces. You’re just reworking theirs. That’s plagiarism any way you distort it.”
His expression told me I had said the dreaded word. “What about you?” he asked from the hot seat. “You read Hemingway’s ‘The Old Man and the Sea’ and that’s what inspired you to write ‘Caught in a Rip.’ That’s plagiarism. The Old Man is out at sea alone talking to himself. Your Lilly character is out at sea alone talking. What do you call that?”
“Well, first of all, The Old Man is talking to his marlin and to the sharks. He’s always safe because he’s in a boat and can see the lights of Havana to guide him back to shore.” I suddenly realized I didn’t have to defend myself but it was too late. “My ‘Lillian’ is in the water, out of sight of shore and most likely caught in the North Equatorial Current with nothing to her benefit but snorkel, mask and fins. And since she’s alone, it took practiced writing skills to get the reader to know that the dialog is interior monologue that everyone probably goes through before they die.”
“Same story,” he said. “You copied Hemingway.” Now he was acting like a person who saw the end of something good and meant to have the last say, but I wasn’t through.
“I read Hemingway’s book three or four times over two decades,” I said. “While it inspired my plots, by the time I wrote “The Tropics,” it had been three years since I last read the ‘The Old Man.’ I didn’t pick up Hemingway again until I was into the third draft of my ‘Caught in a Rip’ story.” He said nothing. I couldn’t help but finish making my point. “When did you ever put a book aside and never open it while writing you own story?”
“Don’t have to,” he said. He rolled the manuscript he held into a scroll and tapped it against a palm. “My plots come right from what I’ve read. Gotta catch inspiration when it happens.” He was so in denial.
“DH,” I said. “It’s one thing to be inspired by great writers; another to write your own story without copying.”
“You think I’m not writing my own stuff?” he said, whining.
“When’s the last time you’ve written your own story to final draft without looking at anything that someone else has written?”
He fidgeted, tapped the scroll against his hand again, thinking. He honestly looked like he didn’t understand, a way of acting at which I’ve come to learn he was very good.
I was into this way over my head but I didn’t want to read any more of his copy cat stories. And I didn’t want him reading any more of my stuff. Had anything I’d written inspired him, he’d probably already rewritten it and sent it out, so my stories wouldn’t have a chance if read by a same editor. “DH,” I said. “What about your name? You admit your DH Harvey is a pseudonym. No one knows your real name.”
“You think I care?”
“Well, now that I’ve read this takeoff on ‘The Horse Dealer’s Daughter,’ I think I know from where you derived your pen name.” I smiled pleasantly when I said that. I had wanted to end this conversation shortly but my curiosity prodded me onward.
“Oh, tell me, please.”
“My guess is you fancy yourself a Chekov or a Steinbeck or any of the others you’ve copied. Now that you’ve copied DH Lawrence, you’ve given away the secret of your pseudonym. Lawrence is both a first and last name. So is Harvey. Everyone knows your name is not DH Harvey or DH anything.”
Again he hedged. “One reason people use pseudonyms is that they don’t want their identities known.” So what did he have to hide?
“Let’s just end this, okay?” I tried to soften my words because when he tries he really does do a fine edit of my work. “I don’t want to exchange edits any more.”
“Okay,” he said and shrugged. “That leaves me more time to write. I found an opening chapter that I can rewrite for my next novel.”
I dared ask, “And what are you borrowing now?”
He looked smug. “I’ve just finished reading ‘The Idiot’ by Dostoyevsky,” he said. “And I know I can make it better.”
Read More

Posted in Author Blogs, Author Colleagues | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment
Feb 24

“When Editing Backfires” An Article By Mary Deal On The Child Finder Trilogy

About a year ago, I edited an accumulation of short stories for a client. Last week he contacted me and asked why his writing had not been accepted anywhere. I told him to bring his CD over and let’s take a quick look at the stories again. Maybe I missed something in my edits. He arrived this morning carrying a thick folder full of rumpled and dog eared paper manuscripts. Read More

Posted in Author Blogs, Author Colleagues, Guest Blogging | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment